Why are some people stubborn? Some are stubborn possibly because of fear: they could be afraid of a supposed humiliation, or an emotional pain of having their ego bruised. They could be afraid of being taken for granted, being perceived as weak-willed, or being oppressed if seen to be submissive. However, it is important to note that stubbornness is often confused with self-confidence, perseverance, decisiveness, and holding on to one’s convictions. These positive traits can lead to triumphant accomplishments, whereas, stubbornness is akin to arrogance, intolerance and ignorance; it is an obstacle on the path progress.
To be “stubborn for nothing” is to strictly guard against any alteration in ones mindset, being way too rigid in one’s plans. It is to approach almost every situation from the obstinate perspective of concrete and steel, and view almost every issue in black and white. Whereas, life is not always conventional; some realities require occasional shifts, adjustments, and adaptations.
Thus, we can know that someone is stubborn for nothing when he gets angry, frustrated, or irritated as others try to convince him of something he disagrees with. He might even resort to a childish throw of tantrums of words, because, almost every disagreement with him is taken as a personal insult. During meetings, for instance, a stubborn person sees the flaws in others’ submissions without necessarily having a better idea. His focus is more on winning an argument than on making a meaningful contribution. Conversely, a stubborn person might openly agree on an issue, knowing well that he will not eventually carry out the task. His inconsiderate insistence would make him to passively sabotage the success of that assignment.
Any company, organization or family that would succeed should handle the stubborn elements amongst them with maturity and understanding: they are hardheaded but weak-minded. So they love validations, they enjoy praises, and they detest that people should argue with them. However, they should be made to realize that for one person to be right does not mean that others must be wrong.
A stubborn spouse would not apologize even when they have obviously goofed because, they cannot think beyond their feelings of the moment. How many romantic relationships have been shattered because each stakeholder stubbornly clung to their points of argument? Everyone claims to be right, foolishly being led by their misguided ego to sacrifice a happy family on the altar of stubbornness. Great marital relationships can be sustained when the spouses understand that an apology or a concession is not a sign of weakness, but a greater sense of choice between having a peaceful home and being stubborn for nothing.
STUBBORN FOR NOTHING By Abdulfattah Adeyemi
